Merry Merry Christmas

It was a very merry Christmas this year.  Really every year is a wonderful Christmas as we celebrate Jesus and our sins that have been washed clean from His ultimate sacrifice.  This Christmas is an extra special one too because I'm with my mom and there's nothing I want more than to spend this time with her.  So, yes, Christmas is a wonderful time of the year.

We spent the week of Christmas with Wade's family in San Antonio.  Wade flew in from CA and picked the kids up on Sunday while I spent a few extra days with my family and my grandma who came into town from Illinois, and got some major quality time in.  Oh and I got to sleep in a few mornings too.  It really pumped up the volume and I felt energized and ready to tackle more early mornings and frequent interrupted sleep from that little Brenner boy.  But boy are my kids travelers.  They'll sleep anywhere, do anything, change, flip, or reverse their schedules...

The kids had a terrific time in San Antonio.  They played on the trampoline, went up and down the grass hill, and had a blast spending time with their 2 cousins, Colten and Caitlyn.   We spent Christmas Eve chatting, visiting with Pa, and watching the kids as they ran like a pack throughout the house.  My brother-in-law, Keith, made chicken and dumplings for dinner.  And they all swore it was a tragedy that I lived in the south and never had chicken and dumplings.  Ever.  And man were they de-lish!  More pictures of our time in San Antonio to come...   (Sidenote:  I got a brand new camera for Christmas from my fab hubby.  A striking pink Canon that is just divine.  It's been on my shopping list for months.  Our current camera was 6 + years old and in dire need of an upgrade.  So, as soon as I opened my gift, the memory card was ready to roll, battery charged and I started snapping away.  On our now "old" other camera, which Wade has at the moment in CA, are some super cute pics of the cousins and Pa.  So, more pics to come later!  Stay tuned...)

We left Christmas morning to spend the day with my family.  My grandma, Shirley, was in town from Illinois.  Such a blessing to see her, since I don't know the next time we'd be able to cross paths and visit.  We had a nice 3 week visit with her.  She is the most kind-hearted and giving woman I've ever known.  Emmy called her Grandmother Willow.  That's the tree's name in the movie Pocahontas.  For some reason, Grandma Wells, sounded a lot like Grandmother Willow.  So that's what she's been calling her.  Grandma W is there to please and she's there to work.  She's there to fill your home with aromas that make your mouth water and your heart quicken.  She's there to sweep your dust bunnies and wipe every nook and cranny of your 800 window blinds throughout your house.  She's there to organize, sort, and reorganize.  She's there to corral the kids in the playroom and wind up the jack in the box while Brenner screeches and giggles til that Jack pops out and then shoves it back down for more fun.  She's there to share in a hilarious game of white elephant grab bag, where she gasps in horror as she unveils one of the $1 grab bag items and it was a box of condoms.  Grandma, I'm sorry it was you.  And I'm sorry that I planted such an obscene gift, but it was well worth the laughs.  We love you Grandma, and miss you terribly.

Dad carving that mighty fine turkey.

Grandma cookin' up a storm.

 Picnic time with Brenner

Merry Christmas to all...

Cancer. Chemo. The Dreaded C Words

How to describe my first week home...  amazing.  My mom has been full of energy.  This is the best she's done in a long time.  Possibly the best she's done ever since this whole mess started.  We spent our entire first weekend shopping.  We shopped for cute clothes for the kids and we hit our favorite consignment shops.  We shopped at Toys R Us and Target for Christmas presents.  We ran all over town on Sunday.  It was crazy.  But it felt typical.  It's what we always do.  This is how it's supposed to be.  We had our mom and she was feeling good.  A little tired here and there but good nonetheless.

Then it was chemo day.  I had no idea what to expect but knew that I wanted to be a part of it.  My mom's friend, Crystal and I drove my mom to Georgetown about a 20 minute drive, not far at all to the cancer center.  My mom checked in at the front desk and proceeded to walk through the doors marked Chemotherapy:  No one under the age of 14 permitted.  To the left of the room, was a row of 7 navy recliners, with only a few to spare.  Then on the far right of the room, were chairs for visitors.  In the middle of the room, is a large counter with various supplies for the nurses.  The room is rather quiet, with conversations between nurse and patient, or between visitors or staff.  The nurses move from patient to patient checking bags, starting IV's and hooking up drugs through ports.

I watched as my mom got nestled in the chair, took a quick gaze around the room, and looked up as the tears started streaming.  I thought that if I looked up, maybe the tears would stop.  I got a quick handle, and knew that my mom's strength is above and beyond.  I've been holding it back for awhile now and it just hit me all at once.  This is really happening.  My mom is a regular visitor at this cancer center.  She's been receiving chemo every other week for the last 5 months that beats her down and then has to fight with the little energy she has left to build herself back up.  You're my everything mom, I love you.

My mom's blood cell levels were borderline and they had to get permission from the doctor to proceed with chemo.  Dr. S naturally said to continue, and I could feel weary emotions.  This is the second time this has happened.  And the last time mom's white cell level was low, she was hospitalized.  And who wants to go through that much of a low again...  But my mom being the fighter she is, decided to go through with it.  And we'd all be behind her and help her through as much as we can.

My mom has a port above the right side of her chest.  I held her hand as they poked the needle in since she forgot her numbing medicine.  The nurse put something over the skin to numb, but it didn't seem to work.  After a large poke and lots of discomfort, the IV went in and the first bag was en route.  It was a small bag that had Benadryl and other drugs for nausea, sort of a preliminary bag.  Then she had 2 bags of the good stuff.  Or the bad stuff... whatever you wanna call it.  The chemo.  The stuff that tears down a body and makes you feel miserable.  But the stuff that makes you better as it kills the bad cancer cells.  The 3 of us were sitting there, chatting it up with a sweet old lady sitting next to my mom.  She also was suffering with colon cancer.  My mom and her have met several times before as they would sit next to each other, talk of all their similar side effects such as a thing called "chemo brain" (forgetful, and can't seem to find the words) and a freezer burn sensation on their fingers, toes, and tongue where she can't touch anything cold or drink or eat anything cold.  They would share stories that would distract and make the time go by a little faster.  It's got to be nice meeting someone that you can describe things you're going through and the other person just gets it.  Because she has been there herself. 

As soon as those drugs go in, there was an automatic shift in my mom's comfort.  She was getting really nauseated and the anti-nausea medicine in the preliminary bag was not doing its job.  She didn't want to eat anything.  She didn't want to drink anything.  I grabbed a few snacks from a gift shop, but it was the Country Time hard candies from that kind lady sitting next to us that did the trick.

After 3 hours and 20 bathroom trips due to all the fluids, she was done.  Bi-weekly task complete.  We wished everyone a very Merry Christmas and made our way out to the car for the drive home, with a pump attached to mom that delivers more drugs over a 44 hour period.

The following week was rough for her.  Chelsea ended up taking mom to the cancer center a week later for fluids and to see if there was something, anything, that could make her feel better.  After talking with the other oncologist in the practice, Dr. D, they both made the decision to quit chemo after 9 treatments.  Her surgeon in Dallas had the similar thought when he found out how rough chemo was on my mom.  He said, "Why do you do it?  Why don't you just quit?"  With 2 superior doctors on her side, and all of her family and friends' support, she made the decision to stop treatment and get on the road to good health and feeling better.  She has an 85% chance of cancer not returning as of now in her treatment process.  And if she had finished her last 3 treatments, the odds wouldn't change.  She will go in to the doctor every 3 months for blood markers to see if anything shows up.

God is wonderful and has given her quite an obstacle to get through.  We appreciate everyone's prayers so far in her journey.  It's been a long one for her and I know she's ready to be back to normal.  She is doing really well.  She still gets tired and nauseated, her bones ache, and she has pains and other slight side effects here and there, but there has been a world of improvement.   

Texas at Last

We're here in Texas at last.  It's been a long time coming.  The plane ride was rather eventful.  My sweet mother-in-law, Letha, flew into California on Saturday to help me fly out with the kids on Monday.  She's a saving grace.  I was slightly nervous flying by my lonesome with 2 kids.  And then throughout the hustle and bustle of airport security, the several rushed bathroom trips, the 3 carry-ons while toting a 3 year old and pushing a 15 month old in an umbrella stroller, the up and down terminal hunt to find "healthy" snacks, the games of "how am I going to entertain Brenner on the plane when all he wants to do is crawl through the aisle and scream in our neighbor's ear"... I thought to myself, what was I thinking?  There's no way I could have done it on my own.  No way. 

We were fortunate enough to sit in the very back row of our first plane.  Although I think Brenner ended up being a loudspeaker as his screams echoed and bounced from one row to the next.  Ugh.  It was definitely a struggle keeping that little man quiet and keeping him still.  I buried my face the whole flight, uneasy about the expressions on people's faces.  But I have to tell you, I can't count how many people were complimenting me on my kids and bounced around the expression of "we've all been there."  Whether it was the truth, or they were trying to make feel better, it was still nice to hear.  And it made me feel good.  Even though we (we of course meaning Brenner), were the loudest on the plane, there were still people that weren't phased and understood, and even tried to help as one man graciously held our luggage as we got the kids situated in their seats.  It's people like that, that give me hope that maybe just maybe... I could have done it on my own.  Oh, who am I kidding.  I needed the help. 

I decided to forgo the carseats on the plane, and checked them instead.  There's no way I wanted to juggle it all through 2 airports.  So, Brenner sat on my lap.  Or stood on my lap.  Or laid on my lap.  Or leaned on my lap.  He was all over the place.  Letha had Emmy sit next to her and they read books and watched as we sailed through the cotton skies.  Brenner enjoyed looking out the window as I pointed at the teeny tiny spectacles below. 

At the end of the first flight, I don't know what I was expecting for the second...  It might be just as crazy or worse, crazier...  As we boarded the next plane in Phoenix, we got settled in the first row.  Yes, the first row this time which means so much extra leg room.  So I sat with Brenner and Emmy on the left side of the plane and Letha had a window seat across the aisle.  There was a sweet lady in between us who offered to switch seats where and whenever needed.  Brenner hadn't taken a nap yet, and he was miserably tired and over it.  He wailed and wailed as Emmy sat next to me and just watched.  She did so well all day, by the way.  So he was screaming and tossing and turning, and I'm sure the flight attendants were just delighted that we were right there in the first row.  They hardly glanced my direction which is an obvious indication that they were less than amused.  But the funniest thing happened as our wheels left the ground, Brenner fell fast asleep, snuggled in the crook of my right arm and little legs sprawled across my legs.  I bundled a blanket around him and he slept for that entire 1 hour 45 minute stretch.  And he so needed it.  I had no feeling in my right arm and my body grew restless, but I'll take this over the other any day. 

And we landed on that sweet Texas ground and I was leaping my way through the empty terminal to search for those familiar faces.  Emmy had a minor incident and fell flat on her face before we got on the elevator to head downstairs and as her deafening cries escaped her mouth, I knew my family wouldn't have to search very hard to find us.  Sure enough, we were instantly spotted and embraced and loved on.  And if it wasn't for our lost car seats, the night would have ended perfectly.  Of all the things they had to lose, why oh why the car seats?  We only had to wait an extra 30 minutes or so, but they were finally recovered and sent down the chute and our whirlwind of a day was complete.  Letha, the kids and I... we did it.  And I can't thank her enough for willingly traveling with my family circus.  We are so grateful.

Golden Birthday

This year I turned 27.  I've been waiting for this birthday for years.  I remember as a little girl, I would think, it's going to be so cool when I'm 27 on the 27th.  And it's true... how cool is that golden birthday. 

We decided to try out a new place outside of town.  On our different excursions the past few weeks, I'd always notice this restaurant on the left-hand side settled just before getting on the Interstate.  It always seemed to be packed.  And tonight was no different.  Of course, this time it was lit up with that Christmas sparkle. 

The Harris Ranch Inn and Hotel is an amazing steakhouse with a western theme that is decked out with cow hides and animal heads mounted on the walls for display for a true rustic theme.  It has a full menu to please whatever your palette craves.  Literally, they have everything on the menu.  From pastas and seafood to award-winning pot roast and ribs.  Another thing that's nice is this place is totally kid-friendly.  Although, we went kid-less on this occasion.  We sat near the bar in the adults only section.  I laughed at myself when I told the hostess I'd wait an extra 15 minutes just to sit in this reserved area...  It just felt like more of a hot date this way, I suppose.

Our food was... delicious.  We started with mouth-watering spinach and artichoke dip.  It was served with colorful tortilla chips and the most amazing toast wedges that Wade swears by.  Our fillets were also fabulous.  I think I got 4 bites in and was completely about to bust out of my pants.  We were set at a perfect table right across from this evening's live music.  A man and his guitar.  And he was so good.  He knew a lot of songs, as well as doing some of his original music.  So very talented.  He was taking requests and in between songs, Wade asked him if he knew a particular John Mayer song that I love, but he didn't.  Wade looked through the gentleman's book of songs, found one, and wrote it down.  A few songs later.  The guy says, "This one goes out to Megan.  ...it's her birthday tonight.  Happy birthday, Megan."  I am so easily embarrassed and could feel the pink rush to my cheeks.  Then I heard the first few chords. This is secretly one of my favorite songs, You Look Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton.  And Wade didn't even know how much I love this dang song.  We listened to a few more ballads, and felt guilty for camping out at our table, since we were done and already paid out.  So we left and went on our merry way.  Nights like these boost my spirit and fill my love tank.  Now that I'm overflowing and soaring high on this golden birthday, I can go back home and brush my kids' faces as they lie peacefully asleep in the cozy nooks of their beds.  I am blessed and so happy.  Thank you, Wade, for making it perfect.

 Emmy took the one above.  She's brushing up on her photography skills.  Not bad Emmy. 

On the Road Again

Our good friends, Isaac and Dynelle, recently moved to Nevada and they graciously invited our family to spend Thanksgiving with them.  I know...brave, right?  They have two little girls, Evey and Amelia.  Evey is 6 months younger than Emmy and Amelia is 3 weeks old, born on Halloween day.  Evey and Emmy were great friends while we lived in Virginia Beach.  We haven't seen them since we said our east coast farewells over the summer.  We both moved our families cross-country about the same time frame and planned to meet up eventually once we were both settled in our new small towns.

As soon as I got the phone call from Dynelle about possibly heading their way for Thanksgiving, I knew we had to make the trip.  For some reason the stress of holidays, having a new little bundle at home, and inviting a family of 4 (more like a circus carnival) to stay overnight for 2 consecutive days was not a cause for alarm.  They must be crazy.  But I am really glad for it.  Because we had a grand 'ole time.

On Wednesday afternoon, we piled in the car and drove for nearly 7 hours to their town about 45 minutes outside of Reno.  Of course that wasn't to go without a quick stop at In 'n Out.  I haven't been to this fast food joint in years.  And I was convinced that Emmy could order something "chicken" or maybe a salad off the menu.  We shuffled our way inside through the crowd of people and scanned the menu.  Hamburger. Cheeseburger.  Double Burger.  I wasn't expecting such a slim selection, especially when Emmy eats like a vegetarian most days.  Burgers it is.  ...And fries she ate.  The kids did wonderful on the drive.  Brenner slept for the first 2 1/2 hours.  Emmy even squeezed in a little nap.

 The last part of our trip was the most beautiful, but of course it was completely dark as we drove through the angelic snow covered scenery.  I was happy to know that on our return home, this would be completely to our advantage.  However I did get a peek of a ski slope in the distance all lit up for the next adventurer to carve their way down the mountain.  Another thing that's on my list.  I can't wait for Wade to take me skiing, oh the thrill!

So we arrived and Emmy and Evey quickly became partners in crime.  They wore their clothes about 5% of the 2 days we were there.  Evey had dress-ups galore.  And Emmy was in princess heaven.  Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Tiana, ballerinas, you name it.  These girls were coming and going.  They'd make a run in their click clack heels to Evey's room, rummage through the tub of dress-ups and instantly transform into an entirely new character.  And Brenner was trying his best to keep up with them.  He liked playing on the huge air mattress best.  I'm sure he imagined he was on an adventure on a huge pirate ship off to discover lost treasure.  Gotta keep up with the imaginations of those two little girls.

What little man wants...

                                                                    ...little man gets.

I couldn't help thinking how big our girls are getting as I watched them play.  They were no longer little babes playing with stacking blocks, but they were little girls pretending to be princesses as they fought over the one prince doll.  Emmy helped set the table and served wooden cupcakes to each place setting.  Evey directed Emmy as to which princess shoes go with her dress selection.  They were these little girls, little princess divas, who couldn't get enough of each other.  By the end of the day, Emmy was referring to Evey as her best friend and sister.  And it warmed my heart.

Besides all of the dressing-up, another favorite activity of the girls was making raspberry lemonade.  Evey pulled up her tall kitchen chair to the counter and Emmy would follow.  And those girls stood up tall in their ballerina skirts and bare everything else, and grabbed those wooden spoons and stirred like crazy.  And then for the most important part of this lemonade experience...  taste testing.

I couldn't wait to hold this little Amelia.  She is sweet, beautiful, and so tiny.  Brenner was a teensy bit jealous when mommy had her arms curled around someone else.  But he eventually got over it, and even gave her hand a little kiss at one point.

Dynelle took this next one.  Perfection.

 Oh, and Brenner learned a new trick.  Check this out!

Yes, he's finally walking.  He stumbles a couple steps, then crouches to the floor, and then stands up and walks 4 or 5 more steps.  And he just grins from ear to ear.

Thank you Dynelle and Isaac for a fabulous couple days.  We can't thank you enough for letting us take over 2 of your bedrooms and turning your house upside down.  Your girls are precious.  Evey has grown up so much over the last 6 months.  She's little miss independent.  And Amelia is darling and just a perfect little baby.  Thank you for preparing a wonderful turkey dinner topped with amazing pumpkin bars.  (I so need the recipe.)  Your house was warm with love and obviously a really good heater since the air was a freezing 18 degrees.  =)  Brrrr...  You are always incredible hosts and we can't wait to return the favor.  It was wonderful being surrounded by some of our best friends that we don't get to see often.  We hope to see you 4 again soon.

We started the drive home on Friday afternoon.  And we hit that perfect scenery just in time, with a little detour through Lake Tahoe.  I turned down staying there overnight so we'd make it home for my birthday, and spend the weekend at home getting ready for the week ahead.  Oh and also the traffic, I wanted to beat that crazy holiday traffic.  But, seriously, did I just say I'd like to pass up staying in Tahoe on my birthday eve?  I doggone lost my mind.